this love

there's a story about a girl who started to fall in love at the age of 17. she doesn't know what's the consequence however, she did know about 1 thing. she admires him, loves him for what he is and on top of that, she never feels like this before. ever since then, she always told the boy, "i love you sayang." both of them were so loving until one day, the girl had to faced between sympathy and loved. she doesn't know that it was a trap. she lose him after 2 years in the relationship with that boy. both of them were really frustrated. while the girl crying for it seems to be forever, the boy on the other hand, started to be a heavy smoker and started to get drunk. but owh, God loves both of them, the boy stopped and the girl still continued her life though sometimes in the middle of the night, she started to cried because she missed the boy so much. everyone told her to stopped thinking about the boy but she couldn't bring herself to forget him. he was there, through good and bad times. she just don't feel like wanted to be with someone else though there were few guys that had offered her a shoulder to cry on. is she being stupid?

she just don't wanna live in denial coz she will feel guilty at the end of the day. after almost 2 years logging for the boy, she still in pain. she still suffered from her 1st love experience. she cried at night, trying to conviced herself to stopped loving him. she did asked God to take this love away but the love is still there. she tried to like someone else but the thought of that boy makes her smile, makes her laugh, makes her world gor berserk. she loves him too much, in fact she just couldn't stop thinking about him every single day. is that an obsession? it's just a true love that she experienced and she still hope for a miracle to come. she hope that the boy will actually realize that she loves him more than anything else in this world. but does that boy know about her feeling? she did told him about her feeling but he just keep quiet. he doesn't reply any of her messages but deep inside her heart, she knows that maybe the boy did read all the messages. because he did told her, she was everything for him. he wanted the girl to be his future wife.

despite of everything, the girl still here. writting on her very own blog. she smiles, laugh at the top of her lung, she cried, she make the best of everything. she makes friends with everyone but love no one. she was hurt badly in the past and she don't plan to make any memories in the future. she just being herself, she just wanted the boy to know that she will be his angel even though no one knows about it.